Smear Campaign

Turning Shit into Gold since 2006

Life After Lifetime

Looks like little Lindsay Lohan is in hot pursuit of a Hollywood premier. Now that she has wrapped production on the T.V. movie ‘Liz and Dick’, Lindsay has set her sights on a starring role in a remake of the classic girls flying off a cliff chick flick Thelma and Louise. What she seems to have forgotten is that it is a long, long way from Lifetime to the big screen.

In between crashing Porsches, impersonating Elizabeth Taylor, and pounding Red Bull smoothies, Lohan came up with a great movie idea and decided to share her exciting thoughts on Twitter.

@lindsaylohan: “Jennifer Lawrence in “The Hunger Games” is genius. I want to do Thelma&Louise w/ her but ala Natural Born Killers (style wise) 2 girls-2 guys (sic)”.

Sober Lohan has always been more ambitious than sloppy Lohan, but this time I feel she is getting way ahead of herself with this half hatched attempt at entertainment. Jennifer Lawrence would be better off starring opposite a horny teenage robot in a Short Circuit reboot. Lindsay’s description of the rewritten plot reads like light budget porn. Two zany twenty somethings riding through the desert in a red convertible, hell bent on finding their way in this gritty world, all the while dragging two buff guys they took hostage from a Waffle House along with them.

We can only hope that this is one of Lindsay’s many unfiltered brain burps because if this crap movie gets made I will lose all faith in cinematic integrity. Grab a sugar free energy drink and hit da clubs sister. Responsibility is not your forte so stick to ransacking jewelry stores.     

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