Turning Shit into Gold since 2006
There are little stories that one hears through the social grape vine, aka too many glasses of wine, that come in handy when one wishes to impress or woo friends with an interesting fact.
For years upon years my go to story when it came to little known information was the one about an A-list Hollywood actor who was booked on one of the 9/11 flights, but instead of boarding the fateful flight he decided to rent a Camaro and drive to Boston. The story always went over well, usually leading people to ask me if I had any further wondrous tales that their ears would be pleased to be filled with.
That was until Mark Wahlberg decided to take a page out of Mel Gibson’s playbook by telling Men’s Journal that if he had actually been a passenger on one of the planes that slammed into the World Trade Center, he most definitely would have prevented the deadly disaster by forcing the terrorists to land the plane.
“If I was on that plane with my kids, it wouldn’t have went down like it did. There would have been a lot of blood in that first-class cabin and then me saying, ‘OK, we’re going to land somewhere safely, don’t worry.’”
Look Mark, not only did you make one of the most ignorant self prophecies of all time but you also exposed and belittled my go to party story that captivated friends and acquaintances alike. You may have played a cop, a boxer, a stalker, and a firefighter, but even with all of that training, I highly doubt that you could have single handedly strong armed the hijackers into postponing their 9/11 agenda.
I want my story back, Mark Wahlberg.