Smear Campaign

Turning Shit into Gold since 2006

Troubling Trend

There is a troubling transportation trend that has become more prevalent as gas prices have recently risen. If you think I am talking about Segway sidewalk zoomers you are well wrong. These grown adult people are shameless in their choice of car substitution. 

When you are a kid you tend to be more likely to be tricked by television advertisements and advice from your peers, so it is easy to see how owning a two-wheeled Razor scooter would seem appealing. Ideas like that should stop sometime in late adolescence, but lately during daily commutes I have seen too many young adults and midlife crisis adults zipping around on updated versions of the Razor scooter. 

I get it, you have to get somewhere real quick and parking downtown is not an option. In all honesty it is actually a good, safe way to get around. Not too threatening on sidewalks and far too weak to compete with mainstream traffic, the Razor scooter is maybe the true answer to all of the world’s environmental woes. 

Alas, something in the soul of society will not let it become a cool, popular mode of transportation. Goofier than Rollerblades and as undesirable as a laser disc, the Razor scooter is still considered a lame display of alternative transportation skills among 99.9% of daily committed anti-automobile travelers. 

So put that pedal to the metal or pound that pavement on wings of Payless soles, but never under any circumstance accept a Razor scooter as a publicly acceptable form transportation. 

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This entry was posted on May 5, 2011 by in All the Funny Things, Smear Stuff and tagged , , , , .

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