Turning Shit into Gold since 2006
There always comes a moment during idle time when I fight the urge to turn on TV. I try to grasp for something more constructive and creative to contribute to the betterment of society, but these ideas seem to be as flighty as a school girl in gym class.
A split second before I eventually decide to power up the old boob tube I honestly do contemplate all of the other activities that I could better fill my time with, like a meaningful act or the lending of a helpful hand.
Is there a petition I should be pushing on passerby, could there possibly be some value in peddling homegrown goods at sweaty farmer’s markets, and other questions of such nature come to mind as I desperately try to conjure up a better plan that does not involve trolling through ad-filled channels.
Almost always I ditch the community service angel that weighs heavy on my shoulder and do what the mindless devil in the back of my mind commands. Usually I regret my decision after I have watched endless, inaccurate depictions of reality but you can’t beat yourself up too bad about stuff you cannot control.
Today was one of those days where my weakness paid off and I was able to enjoy the magic that is Judge Joe Brown. Midday court shows are the absolute best because it is such a relief to see that there are so many idiots in this world and to know that I am not one of them is epicly reassuring.
Swindling rent money from an elderly relative, breaking an ex-boyfriend’s windshield with a brick, battering my spouse, purchasing a vehicle I cannot afford, forging bogus IOUs, stiffing a landlord, and trashing a borrowed motocross bike are all things I can confidently say I will never do.
Sadly these are all things other people do and then shamelessly appear on national television in some failed attempt at collecting petty personal damages. Watching these bottom feeders duke it out in the afternoon might not be the most productive part of my day but it is by far the most entertaining.